Personal log 10-3-2674 - Ted

I have been reminiscing about the past today when it really donned on me that I was really doing this; I was going to Mars. I was going to start over with my life. Most people would think that the decision to move to another planet would take a long time of pondering, but not me.  I guess that says a lot about me. Iv'e moved about a lot over the years, and I've never really figured out what I want to do with my life. Oh, I've had various office jobs over the years, and I've never been out of work for very long, but I have never found anything that has really satisfied me until the last couple of months. I quit my last pitiful office job, and started an apprenticeship working for a farmer. I find that working with the plants, having my hands in the soil has somehow grounded me. No pun intended. After working for the farmer, his name is Henry by the way, for a month he asked if I would be willing to work on the Mars colony. After a couple more weeks of work, I thought to myself what the hell! I didn't have anything to loose. My whole life I had been wandering around trying to figure out what I wanted to do. Why not start over, besides I finally found something I like to do. Maybe now my parents might be proud of me.

I never have had a very good relationship with my parents. I'm not sure why. To people looking in from the outside, I would think they would think that our family was pretty perfect. We did things together, we celebrated all the holidays together, and when were together, it looked overall we got along. But, I always felt like I was the black sheep in the family. It's like I never fit in. I think that my wondering enforced that feeling of being an outsider in the family. It is my hope that me moving to Mars will help me find my way. Somehow I feel that this will be my last move. I'm looking forward to starting my work on Mars.

As a side note I met someone the other day named James. We were able to talk for a while. It sounds strange, but he seems to have more knowledge than his year. I just can't put my finger on it. We did find out that we were going to be living fairly close to each other. Maybe we will be friends. He seems very nice anyway.